Debby Ullman

cont. from page 5

goes down in the books. She's got spunk.

But it's Maxanne Sartori (WBCN Boston) wo who was discovered in Seattle by Sam Kopper, the person who got me into radio, who emerges in my mind as the real cultured get-down Libran lady of rock-'n-roll. All disc jockeys kneel down and give head daily to the condenser microphones before us. But it was Maxanne who sewed the Rolling Stones Sticky Fingers tongue patch on the crotch of her levies, encouraging a little return action. My problem is I have this pedal steel where my crotch should be and I've always been ashamed of it. I've been beaten into submission by program directors who call me dirty names: "You player of too much pedal steel, you" (read -cunt.kid.)

If, as I believe, the women's movement is for the purpose of raising global consciousness from the second chakra (in Yoga there are seven chakras or energy centers-biologically speaking, it's a glandular issue-the second chakra, or genitals, rules see-saw sex, where someone's always on top) to the third chakra (solar plexis, cocaine, domaine, peer power), and all I want to do is get through to the fourth chakra, for a little of the heart action, then things are going fine. I spent New Year's Eve (Gregorian style, not the Vernal Equinox), driving through Cleveland in Betsy Buick as some windowpane was coming on. I managed to make my way through all the anal gaity of juice in the streets of the ghetto a few minutes before midnight, to a door on hipster row (Coventry Road) that said "Heartbreak Hotel," and I knew all had to do was walk in and throw the Mu tea bag in my pocket into some boiling water and sit al alone at the Heartbreak Hotel, listening to MMS which or who was as confused as everyone else about when 1975 actually began. That's what the drunken crazies are all about-to blur the edge. A new year's eve is a border crossing.

How come progressive radio isn't more often the intelligent voyeur, the avant-garde of the craft of communication? There are two basically divergent schools of free-form radio. One, which I think of as the L.A./Boston axis, is based on the principle that the announcer is a whole human being, who occasionally between music shares some personal observation, not always music-related, as he or she would do if indeed all the listeners in radioland were friends sitting around in the living room. The other schoo! I grew up calling the San Francisco/Denver axis, because those were the cities whose free-form stations I was familiar with, was founded and grew on the theory that the music can say it all, that a good progressive announcer is one who plays the tunes, reads the list and shuts up. Cleveland seems to tend toward the S.F./Denver axis, although it really fits into neither school, currently.

It's the nature of creative endeavor in our society that if you must support yourself at it,

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Off My Breast is the WSW readers' forum offering you the opportunity to postulate/recapitulate/ventilate your reactions, ideas or views to express your dreams or your screams. Give us 250 angry, vindictive, sarcastic, obscene, humorous or violent words to print. Be thoughtful. Be outraged. Be outrageous. We'll publish any poison pen letter you have the tits to compose. Don't worry about spelling or grammar, just GET IT OFF!.

I am a secretary, What pisses me off is "Dear Sir:", "Gentlemen:", etc. Why doesn't someone come up with some guidelines about changing forms of address? Seems to me that we never got further than "Chair. person" or "Chairone" (which I prefer). I've called around to some of the local business schools, and they reaching "Dear Sir or Madam" which is fair quated. If any of your readers has access to

information about updated format, I would certainly

like to hear about it. The hardest part will still be getting the bosses to implement them.

I hate companies who claim that women have more absenteeism than men. While it may be true, why don't they realize that it is really people with shit jobs who have more absenteeism, i.e., women. Just how much absenteeism is too much, anyway? Personnel administrators claim that five days a year is reasonable. Give me a break! Unless you work for a bank or a federal institution, you just don't get enough holidays or vacation time. I personally ni all the mental health time I can get! Work would a very attractive place to be if, instead of being th office nigger, I were a department head or a vice president who had his ass kissed every day!

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you don't have the opportunity to be a pioneer in that field at the same time. I've listened to ten times more music since my accident, while I haven't been working on the air, than I did in the same amount of time when listening to new releases as daily homework. I always avoided listening to the blatantly pedal steeled albums (like Gram Parsons' "Grievous Angel" with Emmy Lou Harris on Warner Brothers Reprise and Jonathan Edwards' latest live I.p. "Lucky Day" on Atco, which features some of my favorite pedal steel guitar playing recorded anywhere, by celebrated banjo player Bill Keith.) I put off the new releases by my favorite contry artistslistening to them last, since if I listened and liked them, then I'd be tempted to play them on my program and thereby incite more dirty name calling.

Suzi Quatro's doing her part with her bass and black leathers a sexual subject rather than object. Perhaps many of the cock-rock kids who go to a Suzi Quatro, concert go parking afterwards and get into it in the back seat with the woman on top for the first time. And although I know coming isn't everything, I also know that the only people who've ever said that to me have been my beaux lying on top of me as their pricks shriveled and their come trickled out, and a sea of artificual guilt swam over them. "I didn't get her off. What kind of inept stud am I?" Coming isn't everything after you've come, but when you're working up to it, it sure as hell is.

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